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How I moved on after my marriage crashed – Nollywood Director, Dickson Iroegbu

Here’s the story of movie director, Dickson Iroegbu, who has
been separated from his wife, Efe, for 6 years now, after 7 years of
marriage. Since their marriage crashed, he has had to live with the
reality of playing the role of a father as well as a mother to their
three children.

He shares his touching but interesting story…
Vanguard: Your Experience as a single parent 
It’s an experience better imagined than experienced. Of course, it sets
you backward a bit, but then, if your trust is in the Lord, it will only
be a matter of time and you will get used to it. Six years is almost
gone since my marriage to my wife crashed. It’s been a bitter-sweet
experience.

Coping with the situation 
Positivity is my drive. As a creative person, it takes lots of energy to
handle heartache, but we must soldier on. I have never failed as a
father to my children. My marriage crashed six years ago, but it is not
the end of the road for me. I am still very hopeful for a better wife.

Who to blame for the crash of marriage 
There’s no one to blame, it just didn’t work between us. I mean, we are
two adults, and we both made a choice to opt out of the marriage because
of what you call irreconcilable differences.

Memorable moments shared with ex-wife 
Whatever I shared with my ex is personal, I do not want to discuss her.

Gains and losses of being divorced 

There is no loss, because we are blessed with wonderful kids, so our focus is on them.

Relationship with women after marriage crashed 
My relationship with women has been here and there. If you ask me, ‘na who I go ask?’

Efforts to reconcile?

We tried to reconcile but it never worked. So we are just friends and
equal parents to our children. I will remarry someday because it is not
good for a man to be alone. I am still under 40 years. One day, I will
get married again.

Cost of separation
Both father and mother must stay committed to raising their children. It
is not particularly the responsibility of one person. Whatever went
wrong between two adults should never be allowed to affect the children.
My children have access to their mother without any inhibition, and
that is also applicable to me. They are our children, we are both
responsible for them. Train up a child the way he should grow, so that
he will not depart from it. Every child deserves care, good education
and the much required fear of the Lord.

Advice to single parents
It should not result to fighting if the marriage does not work. Stay as
friends and take care of your children. No regrets, I have no regrets
whatsoever. I just learn to move on.

Why marriages are failing
Major factors to marriage crashes are mostly foundational. It wouldn’t be a forever marriage if the foundation is on falsehood. Life is not like in the movies. Marriage is a natural reality show scripted by God Himself, who is the Supreme Director.

Tireni Adebayo

Tireni Adebayo is the Editor of Kemi Filani News. She has BSC in Mass Communication from the Redeemer's University and M.A in Mass Communication from the University of Lagos (2014 - 2015) where she majored in Public Relations and Advertising and Digital Media.  When she is not writing, she is either listening to music or reading her favorite books. Tel: +2348000000901 Address: Herbert Macaulay, Yaba, Lagos, Nigeria Email: [email protected]

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